Do you try really hard to get them to understand?

Explaining what’s happening.
Reminding them of what’s true.
Efforting to help them see it the way you see it.

If that sounds familiar, you're not alone.

You do that because that’s how you’ve always worked things out together.  Most likely for many, many years.

But today is different… and something you share just doesn’t land.

Then may get mad or push back at you.
They might even disagree or insist on something that truly just doesn’t make logical sense.

Before you know it, you find yourself not just helping anymore…

Now, you’re trying to reason - to convince them of what you know to be true.

And the upsetting truth is, the harder you try…
The more stuck you are likely to become.

This is one of the hardest caregiving shifts to make, because it asks you to let go of something that used to work. And this can make you feel like you are letting go of them.

When the brain is changing, logic doesn’t carry the same weight.

Not because they’re being difficult…

But because their ability to process, reason, and organize information is different now.

So instead of convincing… try something new. 

Try connecting!

Experiment a bit with acknowledging or even validating what they’re expressing — Even if you don’t agree with it.

• “That sounds frustrating.”
• “I can see why that would feel confusing.”
• “That doesn’t feel right, does it?”

And from there…just gently guide them somewhere new.

“Let’s try this.”
“Come with me.”
“We’ll figure it out together.”

Connection first. Direction second.

Because when someone feels understood…

They’re much more able to move with you!